When I opened the back door and saw the stairwell, I was very impressed. She had transformed the unfinished construction grade stairwell to a beautiful space with a rich deep color. Although the protective tape was still on the base of the walls, the work site was clear of all supplies and spotless. I told her "Wow, this is amazing!"
This is when my "mindlessness" happened. Rather than just appreciating her efforts and letting her bask in her accomplishment, I noticed a few spots that seemed discolored.
(*Unbeknownst to me, this is normal and expected with this type and quality of wood)
My internal dialogue said maybe we can fix this and improve it, effectively inserting MY opinion into the situation.
When I pointed out these minor imperfections, she was crestfallen and started to cry. Only then, did I realize what an insensitive, self-centered thing for me to do. I had disregarded the emotional context of the moment and my uninformed, unnecessary comments had cut her deep.
I inadvertently hurt someone I love. That is the worst feeling ever!!
The old adage is true... "Unless you can improve on the silence, it is better to remain quiet."
After putting myself in her shoes, I became very mindful of that.
No comments:
Post a Comment